Perkins wakes up shivering with a headache, Lisa is uncovered in the tent with him, he covers her and pees, hurriedly goes to the fire, now out, and gets fire going, then warms his hands. Today they catch horses, something cowboy Perkins is an expert at, but they don’t have a horse needed to catch the wild horses, so how are they going to get close enough to them to lasso them?
As Perkins ponders the impossibility of the situation, his great faith in the process is instantly rewarded, his lovely new bride Lisa, wrapped in the blanket, sneaks up on him and gives him a good morning kiss. Perkins looks at her, and says the answer to his problem, “Lisa.”
“Yeah.” She looks at him, “What?”
“What do you know about catchin’ horses?”
“Piece of cake. You got some coffee or you goin’ to drink it all for yourself, my fucking head is killing me.” Lisa takes his cup and sits in his lap huddled with her man and warm cup of cowboy coffee, the morning air is still very cold and dry. “This shit would kill a grown mule but is sure good.”
“Drink some water. The coffee will only make you more dehydrated,” Perkins says softly, her ear is about four inches from his mouth. “The Gunner left a note saying he went to scout them out.”
“The horses?” Lisa takes another sip, “That’s a waste of effort, they are already movin’ this way. Last night when you made the decision I told them to come here in the morning.”
“Really?” Perkins replies in doubt.
“Yeah really,” Lisa puts his hand under her sheet robe and rubs her clit with his fingers, are you going to fuck me or you goin’ to leave me to suffer my hotness?”
Perkins obliges Lisa’s sex craving, he starts fingering her and she starts to unfurl from the freezing to death cuddled position, she arches her back and starts to kiss him as she gets turned. The newlyweds are making out and things are getting hot and heavy when Jeffries comes to the campfire. Seeing him approaching, Perkin slyly removes his hand from under her blanket wrap and the lovers act like they weren’t fooling around. Lisa is a little perturbed that the action just stopped.
Perkins leans forward to pour coffee for him, squishing Lisa between her chest and knees, this she enjoys and wraps her arms around his neck pushing her boobs straight out as a tease. He gives Jeffries a hot cup of Joe and Lisa says, “We’re goin’ to catch horses today!”
Jeffries sees Perkins wet fingers and knows whats going on, he looks at Lisa who gives him the look like so what, then he looks at Perkins intimidated, because he’s never been around horses or gone catchin’ them.
Perkins laughs, he sees Jeffries discomfort so he gives him a pointer “All we do is sneak up on them when they’re not looking and lasso them,” he says in a joking voice.
Lisa laughs in response at that retarded advise, “Yeah, like that is goin’ to work,” and she says it with a perfect Texas cowgirl drawl – she is now is taking on that personality. She winks at Jeffries and says, “Next time pour the coffee with your other hand.” Jeffries laughs but Perkins doesn’t get it.
Jeffries takes a sip of coffee and decides to leave the two lustful newlyweds graciously, “Which way did the Gunner go?”
Perkins looks at him, “You know the way, same way as yesterday.” Jeffries downs the coffee like a real cowboy and takes off in a jog toward yesterday’s trail.
Lisa says, “Now where were we?” Perkins seeing that she ain’t goin’ to take no for an answer, throws her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and takes her to the tent where they have very rough sex, if she is goin’ to act like a tough cowgirl, then maybe he’ll treat her just like that – rough. Lisa loves how he manhandles her, she is learning just how to provoke him to get her way. She loves being a cowgirl, it’s the real her.
The two lovers are laying there exhausted and Perkins is pissed, he wasting his energy fucking and he needs to cowboy up and catch them damn horses. Just then, as he has that thought, the four horses Lisa called for, trot by their tent, and stand about fifteen yards away, staring at the two of them, naked under the sheets.
“That was easy,” Lisa laughs, going down on Perkins for another round. Perkins says, there’s four, exactly four. Lisa comes up for a breath of air, “Yep.”
When they get done, Perkins jumps up and gets dressed, “You’re goin’ to turn my spine into jelly woman.” Perkins goes back to the campfire to cook some dinner for the crew, Jeffries and the Gunner have tracked the horses back to camp. They had figured that Lisa must be up to something, Perkins tells them she’s in those horses heads.
They decide to make a contest out of roping the horses, Lisa and Jeffries team up, and the Gunner and Perkins go after the two biggest, a Buckskin and stallion. Perkins ties a rope loop to an end of a long stick, they figure they got Lisa’s team beat by a mile.
Lisa does nothing to prepare, she patiently lets the men leave then meditates with Jeffries on the art of catching horses with your mind. His sensitive side makes him a good student, in no time him and Lisa have the two smaller mares tied up to a tree in camp.
Meanwhile, Perkins and the Gunner have chased the horses down the hill and into a huge meadow, they run around trying to catch the horses by brute force, running on foot which is impossible, the horses are faster. Lucky for them, Lisa’s caught the other two so they stay close by.
Perkins and the Gunner finally figure they have to team up and are able to lasso the Buckskin, they make a makeshift bridle and try riding bareback to go catch the large stallion, but they need a saddle. The stallion manages to elude every attempt, the more they try the worse it gets, the horse starts keeping greater distance with each attempt, they have to give up, exhausted and decide to wait until they get saddles.
Perkins returns despondent to the camp and sits by the fire and watches Lisa taking her mare for a test drive around the nearby woods, she rides up to him and looks down on her pitiful man – who couldn’t even catch a horse.
She leans over the makeshift saddle and calms the mare from the ride by stroking the side of its face, “Want some help?” She dismounts and removes the bridle and lets the horse free.
Perkins decides to send the Gunner and Jeffries back back to the ranch house and steal the saddles they had seen in the barn, they’ll be back the next day sometime, then they can catch the stallion.
The two lovers can now bond in private. She sits next to him, loving her new cowgirl personality, she mocks him, she whispers into his ear, “Big strong man can’t catch the wittle horsey?”
She elbows him, “Seriously, you have to understand what you are doing.” She chews on some venison and tries a spoonful of the stew Perkins is tending.
“If you want to catch a dog, can you if you chase after it? No, the dog will only run away. But what if you call the dog, you ask or command the dog to come to you, will it? It will come gladly wagging its tail if it trusts you, if you chase after it, it is scared, it doesn’t trust you, and tucks its tail beneath its legs.”
Perkins says, “Go on.”
“Trust is the key, dogs and horses easily bond with humans, you first make friends with the horse then call it to you. Once you get good at it, you can call the whole herd or just what you need, in this case four. I didn’t know which four, four volunteered that matched us, that is why four showed up, I wasn’t surprised but you were because you think talking to horses is crazy and impossible.
“So how do you call horses with your mind? You go to the horse in your mind and make friends with it, you tell the horse you are its friend, that you will respect it, but you need to ride it on a great adventure. The horse, will of course agree, because it wants to go on a great adventure.”
“What? Horses want to go on adventures?” Perkins looks at her in disbelief.
“Sure they do, they are no different than us, they have spirits and what spirit always wants is adventure, that is why the spirit occupies the horse in the first place! Why am I with you, for this great adventure, can’t imagine being anywhere else but here with you on this great adventure!”
“So you’re a horse?” Perkins smiles and points, “Got cha’.”
“Good one,” Lisa replies, “This morning you were all worried about catching horses with no way to catch them, but I wasn’t, so while we fucked your mind was elsewhere – catching horses, you were not into the moment because you were living in a future moment of catching horses.”
“So how am I to catch that stallion? Talk to it? Yeah right.”
“Yes. But that will be difficult right now because you’ve been chasing it for the last 3 hours, the stallion is skittish. I will help you, I will speed up the process and calm the horses and establish friendship, trust, and mutual respect. You’ll see. You stay here and rest and I’ll be back in an hour.”
Lisa takes off to the creek, which is about two hundreds yards down the draw, the mare follows her instinctively, like her pet. Perkin stares in amazement, this must be some trick of hers, she must be some kind of witch.
She yells back, “I heard that, I ain’t no witch!”
Perkins watches her strut away, totally victorious, with her prize following her like a new puppy and he sits defeated and depressed, she just negated his entire cowboy childhood of which he was so proud. She just showed him that there is this other way to catch and deal with horses, the horse whisperer way, and it is way easier than what he was taught. He pokes the fire with a stick and wonders how Jeffries caught his horse faster than him.
Perkins is no fool full of pride, he self reflects on this moment, Jeffries did something better than him, so obviously there is something he has that Perkins doesn’t have, he wonders what it is. He then realizes that Jeffries is more sensitive and thus better able to ‘talk’ to horses.
Perkins then realizes that his resentment against gays is from his own feminine side that all men have, and that in this pussified Christian culture that rewards subservience and draws that side of men to the surface of their personalities, is why men hate gays. Gay men have caved to this feminine energy and embraced it and normal men resent their choice. The problem is not with gays, it is with Christianity and what this religion does to men’s psyche.
Perkins is so happy he had this insight, because his resentment toward gays always bothered him but he could never put his finger on the exact reason, and now on this glorious day in the Colorado sunshine running around like a fool trying to catch wild horses he found an answer to a lifelong question. Perkins also knows from his study of metaphysics that finding these answers that dog you gives you more personal power and increased degrees of freedom. Perkins decides he has to learn Lisa’s technique.
Meanwhile, Lisa leads her mare to the creek for a drink of cold water, and the stallion joins her staying about ten yards behind her mare. She takes a nude bath while the horses watch her, horses do not care if you are naked. She dries out on the bank in the mid day sun, the horses eventually wander up to the creek for a drink and when they are done she gets dressed and wanders back to camp with the two horses in tow.
Perkin sees her, gets up and smiles, all is ok now, he needs to learn the new way. Lisa sees his new attitude, “Ready to learn stud?”
Perkins is going to learn how to call horses with his mind, he has now calmed down, he is no longer in the mentality of aggressor that gives chase. They find a comfortable spot under a Ponderosa Pine tree and lay there next to each other, Lisa leads a guided meditation.
She talks in a quiet voice and speaks very slowly, “Close your eyes and take a deep breath, relax your body, and imagine flying over a wind swept field with horses. You see the horses, you are spirit, invisible, you ask to join them, you move in when they accept and you join with them, your spirit is now joined with them. You look out their eyes, you tell them of your need and of a great adventure for such noble horses. You tell them who you are and where you are and for them to come to you.”
They spend a half hour on the meditation, was is deeply calming and relaxing, when she is done she looks over at Perkins, now fast asleep. His stallion is now standing about ten feet away waiting patiently for his new friend to saddle him up and go on a great adventure.